"Be kind and gentle. Everyone is facing a battle you
know nothing about."
I've heard this quote before, and I'm actually not sure who said
it originally, but I’ve thought about it a lot lately. I think I’ve always been drawn toward it
because of how true I believe it is and I’ve probably been thinking about it more
lately because of what I am trying to work through.
After a horrible week at work (the worst in the 9 years I’ve been
there), everything going on in my own life and all the turmoil around the
world, I had to get out, to at least escape temporarily. For those of you that know me, you know how
much the outdoors, and mountain climbing in particular, are a part of who I am
and what helps heal me. So as tired as I
was, I woke up around 4:30 this morning and went for a hike.
It was so what I needed; body, mind, heart and soul. This afternoon after getting back, I felt
like watching a documentary I have on DVD, High
Ground, that I haven’t watched for quite awhile. I usually have a ‘routine’ when I get back
from a hike or climb and until today, watching that hasn’t been part of my
routine. Not intentionally, but probably
more because it is so powerful and emotional that watching it after a hike can
be overwhelming for me (not entirely in a bad way) but emotional and
overwhelming none the less.
But not more than 30 minutes into it (which is about a third of
the way through), it really spoke to me in a way that it hasn’t before. I initially responded just by writing some
thoughts down but it’s like that wasn’t enough.
Then I began to realize what I was seeing in it that I wasn’t aware of
before. And why I think everyone should
watch it.
If you haven’t seen it, which most of you probably haven’t, it is
the story of 11 Iraq war veterans that came home with some type of life
changing injury or condition; physical (one veteran was blinded while serving,
others lost limbs), some have traumatic brain injuries, and still others suffer
from PTSD. In an effort to give them an
experience that will hopefully help them find the strength, hope and healing
they seek as they come home and empower them in their healing journey, they are
mentored by Everest summiteers such as Eric Weinmeyer, the first blind climber
to summit Everest as well as other guides.
With guidance and training, the ultimate goal is to summit Lobuche, a
high altitude Himalayan peak in Nepal near Mt. Everest.
Given the turmoil right here at home, from the economy and
healthcare to school shootings, and in the world right now, from the Ukraine to
the Middle East to the newest situation in Iraq and, this may seem like a
political post BUT IT IS NOT. And while some may still see it that way, I
hope that most of you, I think those that know me will get that it isn’t, will
see it is the exact opposite. I’m
intentionally not including any of my personal opinions (other than the fact
that while I am more liberal than conservative, I consider myself independent
more than anything else), beliefs or politics in this post because I want to
look past that. And as I was watching
today, that’s what I saw. I saw what is
too often lost in all that is going on both here and abroad, the human factor. Beyond the anger and hate, the left and the
right, beyond what is on the surface and going on around us, are human
beings. At the core, we are all
human. We hurt and grieve, and like the
quote said, we all battle something at some time in our lives.
As I was watching this afternoon, that’s what spoke to me, the
human factor. And the more I watched
and thought of recent news, the more I realized that too often the human factor
is too easily and too often forgotten.
What struck me is that the veterans in the film don’t get into their
personal politics (i.e. should we have gone, should we go back, etc.) but
rather they share how their experiences over there affected them as human
beings. The veteran that was blinded
while serving in Iraq is almost always so positive and strong, yet they also
show him sharing how he wants so badly to see the Himalayas as they are
climbing. And he starts crying, as did
I. I don’t care what your personal
beliefs, politics or opinions are, that
right there is the human factor at it’s rawest.
Another veteran, a female aircraft mechanic, shares in the film
how she began to suffer from PTSD by her 3rd tour of duty, after
losing friends, being molested by another soldier, and not having anyone to
turn to for support. On Christmas Day,
she thought the only way through her pain was to end her own life. She was walking to the flight line to check
out a weapon when she realized, as she puts it, something was wrong with
her. I myself have felt that kind of
pain, more than once. But I don’t think
it’s something wrong with her at all, but the fact she had no support, no one
to see the very human and legitimate pain and hurt. After going to the mental services support,
she came home. She was asked to share
her story in either a newspaper or magazine article and received mostly all
positive support, but they show in the documentary how some people think she
didn’t even deserve the treatment she was getting for her PTSD because she ‘was
just a mechanic’. Now I’m sorry, but there is something wrong with anyone who thinks she
doesn’t deserve to get all the support and treatment she needs. Because getting treatment for any trauma has
nothing to do with politics, etc. it has to do with the human factor; treating,
respecting and seeing people as human beings.
The more I think about it, I think losing sight of the human
factor is a big part of what’s wrong in politics, in arguments over everything
from the economy and spending to healthcare and school shootings. Don’t get me wrong, there will always be
politics, opinions and arguments. That
too is part of being human. But I really
believe we have gotten so focused on those, that we have lost sight of the
human factor. And if my own trauma,
battles and healing journey have taught me anything, it is that there’s room
for both and we need both. It doesn’t
have to be black and white, it shouldn’t be black and white. We need both and there is room for both but
no one seems to see that, they only see one or the other, as if it’s black and
white. Well, it’s not.
While I can relate to broader aspects of trauma and healing, I
can’t even begin to imagine what personal battles these Iraq war veterans faced
(and may likely still be facing), what battles a survivor of a horrific natural
disaster faces, what it’s like to battle a chronic and/or terminal illness, or
other battles people face that I haven’t.
As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse who is just now really starting
to face her demons and truly heal, I know the battles I’ve faced, the even
harder ones I face now as I really heal, and I know there will be more to come
because that is part of life, especially if you choose to live it at it’s
fullest. That too (living life to it’s
fullest) is part of the human factor and something everyone deserves to
experience. And I intend to live life at
it’s fullest. Even now, in my darkest
moments, I may temporarily lose sight of that, but that vision, that drive is
always there; it never really leaves me and I can always tell when I feel it
again, like when I was hiking today.
And that is what I really believe High Ground is all about and why I think anyone and everyone should
watch it at least once. Because it’s not
about politics, war or soldiers, it’s about human beings facing their own
personal battles, both on and off the literal and figurative mountain, and
sharing their stories from a human perspective.
And that’s why I wanted to write a post about this, because maybe if we
can start incorporating the human factor into our own lives and into what is
going on around us, we can start healing the world, not making it worse. It doesn’t mean there won’t be conflicts,
problems or differences, what I believe it means is that we will be able to
work through them much more peacefully than shooting each other, waging war or
tearing each other down.
Watch the film and you will see that when you are climbing a
mountain, there is no place for politics, etc.
Because the only real way to the top is to see the human factor in
yourself, your fellow climbers, the mountain your are on, and the world. And that’s the thing, when we act human, from
a place of kindness like the quote says, it’s like we are those 11 veterans in
the film, climbing our own mountains and overcoming our own demons.
So I guess a lot of this is my personal beliefs, but from a human factor, nothing more, nothing less. I just want to say that there are a few other reasons I was really moved watching the film. First, because while I am not a veteran and can never know what they go through, as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, I know that kind of trauma and mountain climbing is such a part of me and my healing, so watching them and seeing their stories is such an inspiration. Second, this blog is both a way to express myself and part of a bigger project, writing a book, which I will add more to under that page now that I have put myself out there, which is huge for me. The other huge way it inspires me is that I would like to create a non-profit for adult survivors of sexual abuse that gives them an opportunity to climb a peak (not necessarily a high altitude peak abroad, though I don't rule that out as I myself plan on doing many of those as part of my healing) as part of their healing journey. I believe it is so empowering and really gets to the human factor!!
So I guess a lot of this is my personal beliefs, but from a human factor, nothing more, nothing less. I just want to say that there are a few other reasons I was really moved watching the film. First, because while I am not a veteran and can never know what they go through, as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, I know that kind of trauma and mountain climbing is such a part of me and my healing, so watching them and seeing their stories is such an inspiration. Second, this blog is both a way to express myself and part of a bigger project, writing a book, which I will add more to under that page now that I have put myself out there, which is huge for me. The other huge way it inspires me is that I would like to create a non-profit for adult survivors of sexual abuse that gives them an opportunity to climb a peak (not necessarily a high altitude peak abroad, though I don't rule that out as I myself plan on doing many of those as part of my healing) as part of their healing journey. I believe it is so empowering and really gets to the human factor!!
